I know this is running blog and not 'Dear Diary' but...

This week was incredibly soul sucking. A co-worker of mine died suddenly and I am reeling. I am a hospice nurse, and I spend my days with death and dying, and I am reminded always that each next moment cannot be predicted, and that it is only a single moment in which everything can change, and all those other poetic things about the nature of life and death and impermanence, but I am so blown away right now that there's really nothing existential to contemplate but overwhelming sadness.

Latest breaking ankle news (no pun intended)...

Ankle x-ray was negative for (evident) fracture but did show arthritis. Frankly, that doesn't surprise me as I sprained it badly years ago and there were times, later, when I was doing martial arts that there was weakness there. I don't, however, think that arthritis is the source of the problem as I am still feeling no improvement with the pain. I have been taking ibuprofen 3xday for possible inflammation and that blunts the pain but does not resolve it. I am seeing the doc (not the nurse practitioner this time) on Monday and intend to ask for a bone scan and sports med referral. Even if it is "only" arthritis, I want to find out how to run safely on it again.

Still a runner in my fantastical brain...

Reading running books, running mags, running blogs, thinking about running, talking about running (in spite of the fact that the response I get is "look where running got you"). Despite the fact that I continue to not be able to run, as time goes on, I feel more and more relaxed - accepting that I can't do it now but feeling more sure that I will again! Meanwhile I guess I ought to drag-ass that old bike out of the basement and stop sitting around waiting!