I'm here...
 
     Uninspired, unmotivated, but here.  It has been a busy couple of weeks at work and my internet time has been minimal, but the real story is that I'm just being damn sluggish.  Looking back at the enthusiasm of my previous post, I feel a little embarrassed. 
 
So what's going on??? 
 
     I think I'm afraid.  I still think about running all the time, and any time I pass someone running when I'm driving I am like some rubber-necking voyeur, trying to watch them as long as I can in the rearview - having flights of imagination that it's me, or glimmers of hope that it eventually will be.  The thing is, even though the Dr. cleared me for running again, I still haven't because I'm still having pain.  Not alot, not hardly any - mostly soreness to lesser and greater degrees, particularly in the morning, strangely.  But enough to make me way more skittish than I would have imagined.  It's not related to weight bearing, it's related to range-of-motion, and so some stupid movement will remind me that I'm not healed and leave me completely discouraged despite a day that was otherwise pretty comfortable.  
 
     So I'm nervous - I sit and wonder if the pain will ever completely go away.  Common sense says it will but it's been long enough that it's hard to imagine not having it.  Eight weeks feels like a long time, and maybe it's really not in the scope of healing from an injury, maybe I'm just impatient.  But even though the doc gave me the ok to run - my gut is telling me that I shouldn't.  I am so scared of going out there and re-injuring myself in any way and being sidelined again.
 
So how's the crosstraining going?...
 
     Yeah, well...um.....
 
Some cheese with that whine...
 
     The real story is that I am being lazy.  I know I'm not ready to run just yet but there's a hundred other things I could do and I am really just dragging my feet.  I keep waiting for magical inspiration to come like a lightning bolt when I know that what it's always been about is just going ahead and doing it - making the time, making the effort, making the committment.  I'm just having such difficulty getting back there.
 
     So anyway, thanks for missing me :)  Thanks for the prompt, Jon !  I have been remiss in keeping up on RBF blogs and that makes me more sluggish because they are so motivational and encouraging to me.  I hope to be speaking the truth when I say I'm back!!
  
    "Care is taken that trees do not grow into the sky."   - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe